Swing of things.

I sincerely apologize to all of my blog readers (I know the number of you is small but I fantasize about my audience being in the thousands) for not posting anything in the last 18 days. It has been a rough, crazy, wild and overwhelming time, to say the least. 

I just started Spring semester a few weeks ago on the 18th of January and our work schedule at the bookstore on campus has been just a little haywire. The last two weeks I have either been in class, working, eating or sleeping. It didn't leave a whole lot of time to do any blogging or fiction writing. My class schedule and work schedule are normal now and I should be able to find some time for both, should being the keyword. 

I have some plans for other fiction pieces that I wrote. I want to make Madden a longer story and develop the characters more and have more things happen to them, I realized that you really don't get to know any of the characters too well other than the main character, Madison. Who knows, maybe it could become my first novel - or novella.

I may want to start trying to write some children's books and in order to really share those they need to be illustrated and put together. I was thinking about using some sort of digital painting/drawing program to do that. I just wish I didn't have actual assignments to worry about all the time. I just want to start doing stuff and by stuff I mean writing and publishing stories. The best way to get better and have a chance at actually making money from it is to just put it out there and hope for some circulation! 

Wish me luck! 

Writer's block.

I have a seriously bad case of writer's block. I have been trying really, really hard to finish a story or come up with a new one. I looked up story generator after story generator and tried generating multiple different stories but none of them were fruitful.

I need Margi Preus. She had my creative writing side inspired every Tuesday and Thursday last semester. Who knew a few weeks without her and my creative juices would run dry? I certainly didn't. I thought she had got a great, big ball rolling but somehow that ball stopped and I want it to move again but I'm having a hard time pushing it.

I sort of felt like I was cheating myself and my readers by using a story generator since they weren't my original ideas. I didn't come up with them on my own or magically stumble upon them going about my day in the normal way like I am supposed to. My best stories have come from personal inspirations or problems.

Hopefully, as the semester goes on, I'll get my creative juices back.

Broke.

Lesson of the day: "that purse isn't worth it, I only have two hundred and some dollars in my bank account." I feel broke, I am broke.

I am a college student. In high school I would have felt rich but now I don't. I have textbooks to buy next week and a balance on my student account that I need to pay off. It's just not fair that you can't just rent your textbooks or have a class set of them like you did in high school.

I have been wanting a new purse for a while now but have not been able to rationalize the purchase. The purse I carry now says, "Look at me, I'm a 16-year-old girl!" I need something that says I am a "young", sophisticated adult. I just wish that the purses that said that didn't have such a big price tag. I also wish I could buy all the books that I wanted, but that can't happen either because I have to buy textbooks. How crummy.

The good news, I have thirty-six hours at work next week. I'll probably be able to buy a purse when I get paid next, yay! It'll be my birthday present to myself.

Fluff.

I keep having this dream that my boyfriend comments on my blog saying that all of my posts are "fluff" and that I need to write something more meaningful.

Is it true? Do I need to have a "meaningful" blog? As long as my blog fulfills my need, isn't that enough? Since I am having this dream, there must be something missing that my subconscious is trying to tell me. Well, I want this blog to be an outlet for my fiction, my "lessons" and just a place where I can write. Haven't I done that?

I wish I could dream up a story and write a great, American novel. Probably won't happen anytime soon unless I start writing "meaningful" blog posts so I stop having this "fluff" dream. Maybe I should go on a LONG vacation and keep a diary - or has that already been done? It's just an idea though, I guess.

Maybe I could drive around the country visiting other colleges and sneak into classes and write about it. I wish someone would just pay me to sit down and brainstorm and write unfinished stories. That would be the life, kind of. It would also be nice to be published in one way or another.

I know what I need! A mentor, someone who will coach me through writing a novel. Someone who will keep pushing me when I don't think I can keep writing. Someone who will help me to come up with ideas to keep the story rolling.

One can dream I suppose. If you know of any novel writing coaches, let me know.

Blank page: the writer's worst enemy.

A sort-of-lesson of the day: the blank page is hard to turn into something else. 

I've been having a hard time posting on my blog lately because I am having a hard time turning the empty space in the new blog post page into a "real" post. This is also true of my fictional writing. Even though I have some stories started it is hard to finish the stories and some just aren't good enough to share. 

So, in order to get out of this rut, I am going to just post whatever I think of. I am going to think of a word or phrase or song and just write about it. We'll see how that goes, maybe I'll develop something else for my blog. A new direction, perhaps? Is there direction now?? 

My new years resolution: defeat the blank page. And how will I do this? Starting a blog with word of phrase three times a week, hopefully! Sheesh, already setting myself up for a miniature failure. 

Here's to 2011!